• James Lane

Impossible Meats May Start the Zombie Apocalypse!

By James Lane Reichenbach, Ph.D., MBA, Founder and CEO, American Reveille LLC



No, Soylent Green isn't quite people yet. Impossible meats have been thrust onto the scene recently, literally shoved down our throats. The average consumer could care less for such a pretentious product. Still, the billionaires interested in profiting from this new frontier of "meat" insist we choose fake meat instead of real nutrition. As they've alluded to, our lives depend on it. All jokes aside, these new impossible meats that look, taste, and even bleed like real meat are about as good for you as spoonsful of Crisco.


The same old band is waiting behind the curtain to give you inflammation and heart problems. GMOs and heavy chemical additives, corn syrup products, gluten, and other things you don't want in your body make impossible meat a reality. Seriously, at least the old-school vege-burgers were made of vegetables. These burgers are made of sweat, shame, and twisted science.


Don't just take my word for it. Dr. Amy Myers, MD, goes into great detail, confirming my above paragraphs through her own work and research.


So, what proof do I have that artificial meat may bring forth the zombie apocalypse we've all been waiting for? Well, for one, vegans always seem extremely angry. Like the virus in the cult classic horror flick '28 Days Later,' vegans seem to have contracted early onset RAGE. Oh, and the Chief Operating Officer for Beyond Meat, Doug Ramsey, was suspended for literally biting a man's nose off in September. So, when you anger them, they immediately try to eat your face. That sounds like the beginning of any Zombie apocalypse movie I've ever seen.


Remember, I'm just pointing out the strange truth, yet people wonder why plant-based meat sales are declining. The consumer is thoroughly rejecting all artificial meat products, but still, we see more plant-based products roll out in stores like Mcdonald's, KFC, Panda Express, Taco Bell and more. They even released fake steaks at Walmart last month.


Do you see what's happening here?


So, maybe the zombie apocalypse isn't coming, but that depends on your definition of the word zombie. You see, it's obvious we don't have a choice here. Sooner rather than later it will become "eat the fake meat, become a zombie, or be wished away into the cornfield."


I only present you with the choice, and the choice is yours.


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[Note: Our bloggers are independent writers with their own constitutionally granted opinions, viewpoints, interpretations, and feelings. Their views do not always represent that of American Reveille LLC. Regardless, we support their right to free speech and a medium to express it! Got a problem with that? Go somewhere else!]


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